Day Seven: Eight ways to win my heart

8_pictureEight ways to win my heart:

8: Hold my hand in public. In other words, show me that you’re proud to be seen with me.

7: Play with me. Play video games, word games, absurd games. Youth is nurtured by the right kinds of games. Laugh, make goofy jokes, laugh at my goofy jokes… Don’t be afraid to be silly with me.

6: Be my friend first, but don’t let that get in the way of being my lover, too. That means calling me out when I screw up, but don’t hold it over my head. It means not withholding affection when you’re mad or sad or whatever (because of me or because of something else). Talk to me and trust me to be your friend first, too.

5: Tell me what you really think and feel about me. Am I pretty? Do you think I’m clever? Honest compliments go a long way with me. They’re the other “magic words”, and they are very powerful – especially from the ones that have already earned my love and respect.

4: Treat me the way you want to be treated because that’s the way I’m treating you. That can mean specific things like leaving love notes, or it can mean the general spirit of an action. I’m also assuming that you’re treating me the way you want to be treated, and in the end, we should end up with an affection style that’s a hybrid of the both of us.

3: Apologies are ready important to understand. They are an admission of having made a mistake. They are not admissions of unworthiness or inferiority. Take them well and give them well.

2: Share cool stories from the news, from your friends, from your life. They tell us so much that we couldn’t possibly knee how to share any other way.

1: Food is love, and likewise love is food. Feeding me good food is always a step in the right direction, especially if you’ve made it yourself, but a nice dinner out isn’t bad, either. At the same time, showing and giving me honest love is a food. This is how I show you my love as well, and having a “compatible pallet” to my cooking style is way up there.


This one is always a tough one for me because I think usually that I’m pretty easy to get on with… and then I realized, it’s not just about making me like you, it’s about winning my loyalty and devotion.  That’s a bit of a different angle, non?

I tried to write it as though I wasn’t already in a serious relationship and base it solely on the things I’ve learned, especially in the last year. Any similarity to any current activities is purely coincidental.

Annual Days of You

14Fourteen Days of You (that’s two whole weeks!)

It’s that time again for the end-of-year Days of You.  We’re changing it up a bit and expanding, and posting way ahead of time so that you can put some thought into it. Yes, some of the questions have changed, and that’s a good thing.

The goal is to post each of these things starting no later than DECEMBER 18th, one per day, to your blog, Facebook, tumblr, or whatever, so that you’ll end up posting the last one on New Year’s Eve.  They are meant to be processes of self-discovery and honesty.  In certain cases, feel free to leave the recipients anonymous, but as much as possible, speak from your heart.  If you’ve been tagged, feel free to lift it and tag other people, too.  This should bring you into the new year in a more grateful and focused way.

Day One:  Fourteen things that happened this year that rocked

Day Two: Thirteen things that happened this year that sucked

Day Three: Twelve things that you find delightful (funny, comforting, etc)

Day Four: Eleven things about yourself (that some people maybe don’t know)

Day Five: Ten things you are enormously grateful for

Day Six: Nine things you want to say to nine different people right now (anonymous is fine)

Day Seven: Eight ways to win your heart

Day Eight: Seven things that cross your mind a lot

Day Nine: Six wishes you would make for six different people

Day Ten: Five wishes you would make for yourself

Day Eleven: Four turn-offs

Day Twelve: Three turn-ons

Day Thirteen: Two historical events that mean a lot to you (and why!)

Day Fourteen: One confession

End-of-year challenge: Day Five, Eight Ways

Day Five: Eight ways to win your heart

1. Yarn.  Yummy, yummy yarn.

2. Compliments are (almost) always appropriate.

3. Making coffee before I wake up (or at least get out of bed myself) has always been the high-mark of love to me.  The smell of that first pot is like nothing else in the world to warm the cockles of my heart.  Maybe even the sub-cockles.

4. An excellent foot rub after a long day of running around, and an excellent shoulder/back rub after a day of slaving over the computer

5. Cook like you love me, like I cook for you.

6. Show me something amazing that I’ve never seen before.

7. Know the difference between being strong and being stubborn.

8. Know the difference between being flexible and being a push-over.