I guess part of the answer I found to my question was “Sometimes the way forward is found by going back.”
Either that, or my masochism is showing again.
Anyway, I started poking around and trying to find some regular column spots – freelance stuff, but hopefully steady – and I happened across this site:
There’s one 500-word bit on knitting socks (pretty darned funny), and another one on being a skinny diabetic. (I figured, what the heck.)
That’s my submission page. The more thumbs-up I get, the better the chances that I actually get “hired” (i.e. converted to a real contributor), and then that’ll be one more gig to help fill the gaps that will no doubt be left by the impending hospital bills. (I heard a loud beeping outside today and thought it was the forklift finally bringing home that last, fateful bill, but it turned out to be the garbage guys.)
I’m also open to suggestions if you’ve stumbled across other pages that might be looking for witty, wacky, or willful writers. (Yeah, that only LOOKS like a four-part alliteration.)
I have to say this about that Rafters site, though: If they consider things like grammar, spelling, sentence structure, punctuation, and paragraph form, the competition isn’t nearly as stiff as it looks at first glance. And that’s really a shame because a lot of people had good things to say, but they just didn’t say them very well.