If you would like me to perform your marriage ceremony, we’ll have to have an interview first. I have this thing about only performing this rite for people who truly belong together. If there are some rough edges, we might go through a couple of relationship building sessions before I sign off on it.
And just to be really, really clear, I wholeheartedly support and embrace marriages between any individuals, regardless of gender. One of the reasons I haven’t performed any ceremonies since 2006 is that I couldn’t do so in good conscience, knowing that my actions would not be recognized equally by the United States of America for the LGBTQ community. Now that it has, I am delighted and honored to present myself for you to help mark that wondrous occasion.
Sainings are the types of parties where the community comes together to celebrate and embrace the induction of a newly born member to the tribe. This is also where the godparents are declared in front of everyone, and, as in the Catholic church with their official baptisms, when you have a document signed by both parents declaring the godparents of the child, that is the legal standard if anything should happen to you.
Again, regardless of the genders of the parents, this is a wonderful ceremony to have to introduce your child to your tribe. You know who benefits the most from sainings, though? Adopted children, especially older kids who are being adopted from the foster system. Nothing gives them a stronger sense of community and belonging than to have your decision shouted out to the world and made official through ritual.
Eulogies are a little bit different since I do not lead a congregation (as such). I am a masterful grief attendant, which means that when someone is passing or has passed, I’m available to help make the transition a little easier for both the individual and the family. Whether we have known each other before or not, when you call me for this service, I will come to the individual and the family (hospital, hospice, or home, no limitations) and provide one-on-one or group comforting. This is where I get to learn all about your loved one and help pave the way for a peaceful passing.
The difference between how I provide eulogy/grieving services and how other people do is that I am not bringing any form of religion into this process unless you specifically request it. Eulogy and grieving services not directly associated with your church are traditionally only performed by certified Christian practitioners, which means that atheists, pagans, and other non-Christian, non-church families – or families whose religions cover a lot of ground – are rather left out in the cold. My services are offered without judgment, exclusion, or discrimination.
The true purpose of a minister in this time of trouble is to help the individual and the surviving loved ones with an impartial ear, with wise words and wise silences. We help mitigate the anger and hurt that invariably comes out around a death, allowing these feelings to be expressed (confidentially, if needed) without damaging any other relationships.
The information and stories that are shared during this time are the pieces that go together to draft the actual eulogy itself, to be read during the closing ceremonies (funeral, memorial, or going away party).
Where does an atheist or agnostic go to resolve deep issues of the soul? There are feelings and events and tragedies that don’t seem to be helped in the realm of traditional psychotherapy, and in mainstream religious communities, that purpose is served by a minister, pastor, priest, rabbi, etc. I stand in for those titles and offer not only the wisdom of my experience and studies but also a unique opportunity to heal in a secular and efficient way. Brief consultations are free of charge, and if a healing path is required, such as overcoming addiction, abusive patterns, eating disorders, PTSD, trauma, or depression (to name a few), a short-term program is negotiated according to your means.
I live and work mainly in the Dallas/Fort Worth, Texas, area. I have no issue providing advising services long-distance via phone or chat, and I also have no issue traveling for ceremonies. You will need to provide travel and accommodation arrangements, plus any small expenses. Local-ish ceremonies (in Texas but outside of the DFW area) may incur an additional travel expense of $1 per mile from my central location. (That covers both ways.)
- Weddings: $75
- Three pre-wedding couples sessions: $250
- Ask about the marriage licensing discounts for Texas residents!
- Travel expenses may apply.
- Sainings: $65
- Eulogies: $75
- Travel expenses may apply.
- Assistance with funerary arrangements available.
- Spiritual Advising: $75 per hour
- Sliding scale arrangements can be made for extreme hardship.
Ready to find out more?
Drop me a line from the form below to start a conversation about your needs. I’ll get back to you within a business day.